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Monday, July 27th 2009

10:04 AM

The Second Half of My Life


I’m turning 50 in exactly one month.

It made me start thinking about all of those sentences that start with “If only” and “I should have.”  Which made me realize that I can still do all of those things.  It’s the second half of my life!

I also saw the re-run of Sex in the City in which Carrie bemoans the fact that she, as a single woman who has never had children, has been to dozens if not hundreds of wedding & baby showers, and dutifully purchased the gifts for which the recipients had registered.  She, however, never got a shower, so never got to register.  (She “registers” for a single pair of shoes with a price tag higher than my monthly food budget.)

I realized this applies to me.  I’ve never been married or had children either and, likewise, have bought a bazillion gifts from a bazillion registries.  As a WASP, I never had a bat mitvah, and my family didn’t throw me a high school graduation party, although my parents did buy me a set of luggage.  I took the hint, packed it, and moved out forthwith.

So I’m going to “register” for my 50th birthday.

At 49, I don’t need china or linens and, although I’d love a nice set of stemware, there’s nowhere to put them.  So I probably won’t be able to register at one of the traditional venues (although I was pleased to see that Target has a registry – good for every budget).

Instead, I think I’ll make a web page and recruit my sister as the contact person to keep track of what’s been purchased and what’s still outstanding.  And I’m going to choose some really unconventional stuff. So far, I’ve only decided on four things:

  1. A big, honkin’ party
  2. Sky diving
  3. Bunny slippers
  4. This hair straightening thingie I saw on an infomercial. Apparently, you just hold it anywhere near your head and voila! You look like a super model.



For today’s contest, I am giving away a copy of The Mammoth Book of Vampire Romance and a signed copy of Kerrelyn Sparks’ All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire.  Enter a comment telling me what you think I ought to put on my gift list, and I’ll pick a name at random to win.

The winner of last week’s contest for 5 signed romance novels is Tracy Deluca!  Tracy, email me using this link and send me your mailing address.

103 replies.

Posted by Heather:

I think you need a new digital camera to document your huge party. What's a birthday party without pictures?
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:27 AM

Posted by LuAnn:

The fun side my just-turned-48-year-old brain says you should register for a vacation to some exotic locale. But the practical side of me says maybe add a Sham-WOW to your list. It's supposedly the ultimate cleaning tool and if birthday gift buyers act today, they can grab two for the price of one (at least that's what the commercial says). And your 50th birthday gift registry idea is wonderful! :)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:27 AM

Posted by Carolyn:

I think I nice Spa Day and then a party somewhere.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:33 AM

Posted by Crystal:

You should get a trip to the Spa. Every woman needs a little pampering. :)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:33 AM

Posted by Helen Ginger:

Hard to beat the hair straightening thingy (my curly hair takes forever to straighten). I'd love to be able to just wave it close to my hair and be done. If I had a wish, it'd be for a maid to clean the house, so I'd put that on your list. I don't know, though, those boots on the legs in your sidebars look pretty dang cute. I'm thinking, unless those are your legs and boots, you should ask for those.

Helen
Straight From Hel
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:34 AM

Posted by Brenda Giguere:

As someone who is about to turn 56, never had children and got married in Nevada without benefit of bridal shower or guests, I am supremely annoyed I didn't think of your idea myself when I was turning 50. Good for you!
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:35 AM

Posted by Theresa Meyers:

Forget practical. Put stuff on your list that you'd never buy for yourself normally. You know all the things you put off buying those first 50 years? That stuff. Want an ebook reader? Put it on the list. A pair of shoes? Put it on the list. A back massage chair...well, you get the idea.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:37 AM

Posted by Ingrid:

This goes to personal taste, but "I" would love to go to see British castles. For you, don't know if it would apply. somehow, since you 'are' single and unencumbered with man and brood, a travel of sorts comes to mind. Perhaps Eastern Europe? Asia? A hiking trip in Peru? for ideas, check out @solotraveler on Twitter. She's single and travels alone and writes about it. Happy b'day in advance
Ingrid
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:39 AM

Posted by Anna Guest:

I think you should ask for a bunch of vouchers for different dessert eaterys ... then you can spoil yourself whenever you like without feeling guilty (they are gifts so you have to use them!):)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:44 AM

Posted by Angie:

I've got the Big One coming in September. Pre-birthday wishes to you!

Here's what's on my Five-Oh list:

maid service
bookstore gift certificate
time (so I can revise ms)
mani/pedi
silence and/or alone time
frozen casseroles
and for the love of Pete, an uninterrupted nap.

I really think you're on to something here. Why not canvas a women's store and ask them to start a Five-Oh registry? Lost marketing opporunities. :P
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:47 AM

Posted by Suzanne Pitner:

Happy birthday, fellow Virgo! I'm also turning 50, in one month and one week. I say you should add a balloon ride to your list. That's what I'm gunning for.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 10:58 AM

Posted by Brenda Giguere:

OK; I've been pondering it, and I think all your friends should chip in and pay for the rental of a villa for you for, say, a month or more. Then you can have a big potluck villa party at the end of your stay.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:08 AM

Posted by Rob Charron:

Hi :)
Congratulations on the upcoming Birthday.
You should add a glass-doored bookcase for those hardcover 1st editions.
:)
Love and best wishes from Canada
twitter.com/RKCharron
xoxo
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:14 AM

Posted by heidi2524:

you could list your favorite charities, and ask people make a donation to one of them as a gift to you
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:19 AM

Posted by Lou Gagliardi:

A full of hunky men!
oh..if you're married..umm..for your husband to be your housemaid for a day.

But seriously, some fine jewelry is always good. At least that's what I've heard.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:19 AM

Posted by Sewicked:

1) glider ride (brother got this for mom)
2) Get your portrait painted, and the caricature artist doesn't count
3) an Etsy gift cert
4) some garment made especially for you; not off the rack, not altered; from length of fabric to just-for-you garment.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:34 AM

Posted by Jan B.:

If I had your view of the lake, I would be asking for lawn furniture and ornaments like bird baths, wind chimes. Good time of the year to buy these kind of items on sale.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:40 AM

Posted by Julie:

A Nintendo Wii with Super Mario Galaxies. No really. This game is freaking awesome even if you don't normally play video games!
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 11:50 AM

Posted by Kay Asuni:

I think you should include a trip to London to see the queen. While you're at it a spot on the London Marathon.;)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 12:14 PM

Posted by Mary Ricksen:

That's a hard one Toni. You already have wonderful friends who love you. You have success and actual fans! You have accomplished what many people only dream of doing. You are comfortable, financially I hope and certainly in your own skin.
All that's left is to wish you continued health and happiness. I hope it lasts your whole life through. Not all of us are meant to have children. I was never able to. And as far as husbands, some of that is highly over rated. (grin)
If you are happy with yourself, you have the best gift already. So I wish it to last for you.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 1:01 PM

Posted by Mandy McClanahan:

Pampering yourself, and a friend or two the day after the big party. Take some time to have a girls' day at the spa. Manicures, pedicures, massages, get your hair done....the works! That combined with the big party is sure to help you slide comfortably into whatever age you now want to say you are. :)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 1:09 PM

Posted by Your sister:

BFD, I'm 65 and never had a wedding shower, no kids and the last party given for me was in 1974, a goodbye party when I left Lexington.
I suggest skydiving. I was thinking about that for my 70th. Love you dearly, but you'll only be one day older and still way younger than me.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 2:15 PM

Posted by Susan Hanniford Crowley:

A trip to Iceland, not only do the Vikings know how to party, but the ultimate spa is the Blue Lagoon. They really know how to relax. The storylines will just keep flowing. Then go onto Scotland. The highlands will give you great dreams and Glasgow and Edinburgh are great shopping, castles, museums, and restaurants. Ah, Scotland. Give me a man in a kilt every time. They're not shy about telling you what's under their kilt.

Sue:)
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 2:42 PM

Posted by Christine M.:

A weekend at the spa? Or if you you're a bit of a gourmet like me, hire a chef to come and make dinner for you in your kitchen (that's a fantasy of mine--the food, not necessarily the chef).
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 4:25 PM

Posted by Margaret:

A coming of age party? Great thought. I mean, you're only halfway there...and as medical advances improve, maybe not even that.

I'd say a big, fancy journal. On one cover, put done, and the other put want to. Then fill it out forwards and backwards (or rightside up and upside down) so that for every page you have done something, you have something new to do. You can get your friends to help fill it out :D.

Enjoy your party.
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 5:07 PM

Posted by Maria:

Okay, comments on comments: Brenda - I think you should do the registering for your 60th birthday. Sue - when is your birthday and what do you want to do for it? I say we arrange it!

Toni, you know my birhtday rule: whatever it is that you want for your birthday, then you should make it happen. I am personally still playing around with my plans for my 50th. I am thinking about a few different destination ideas, but I just may end up going with a big ol' party and registering for it too because it is not only the weddings (multiples for some of my friends) and the baby showers (multiples for most of my friends and when did that become de riguer?) but also all of the Christmases where my friends said things like, "Oh, we're not doing anything for the adults this year. Let's just buy for the kids." WTF!?!?! I DON"T HAVE ANY KIDS YOU (bleeped out for PG-13 rating). And the graduations for all of the kids that now begin in F'ing kindergarten. WTF!?!?! Who doesn't graduate from kindergarten and why do I care if your br... uhm, child feels good about that accomplishment. So, my friends owe me - they totally owe me. Hmmm, I thinkI may go with gift cards to the plastic surgeon. I was just noticing the other day that my boobs are totally failing the pencil test and small little upgrades now will pay off later - or so they (the plastic surgeons) say.

Oh, you need to add Dell gift cards to your birthday registry.

Love ya'
Maria
Monday, July 27th 2009 @ 8:37 PM

Posted by JJ Loch:

A framed certificate that congratulates you for successfully avoiding a lot of stress. :D

I have a daughter in her 30's who has never been married and she knows how to live. :D

God gives women in their 50's a recharge and you will think you are 20 again. :D Just had my power surge and it's hanging in there.

Cheers! JJ
Tuesday, July 28th 2009 @ 1:58 PM

Posted by Nancy Cohen:

Get a Wii. It's great for indoor exercise when it's too hot or rainy or cold to go outside, plus it's fun.
Tuesday, July 28th 2009 @ 2:20 PM

Posted by vuong:

Posted by vuong:

Posted by Bertha Bloomster:

I think a trip to Tunica, MS at the Grand with a few close friends would be nice. They afford you luxury while you spend money. They have shows you might like and it's not as crazy as Vegas. Or maybe you might like Vegas more but definitely a get away would be nice.
Tuesday, October 13th 2009 @ 9:20 AM

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