When season 1 of “Survivor” hit the airwaves a few years ago, I don’t think any of us really understood we were watching the first rivulets of a deluge.  I loved Survivor, and so did my friends.  We planned parties around it, munching tacos, swilling beer and cheering on our favorites.   No one made any other plans for Thursday night.  

When Big Brother hit the airwaves, I watched a couple of episodes and gave up.  I had family members who watched The Amazing Race but never got into it personally, and only knew about The Apprentice from overhearing discussions around the coffee machine at the office.   I continued to watch subsequent seasons of Survivor, but only if I had no other plans for Thursday, and eventually became bored with the whole reality TV phenomenon.  I assumed others would do the same.

I was wrong.

In addition to the network shows I’ve heard of, if not actually watched, there are hundreds of others.  Hundreds.  And some of them are really, really bizarre.  I decided to try to come up with a definitive list, and realized it was probably impossible.  I tried breaking them into categories, and it helped a little.   And, as a writer, I couldn’t resist a little commentary here and there.  Even as I’m posting, I know I probably missed dozens.

Do you watch them? Which do you love or hate the most?

Contests for the sake of competition

Survivor

Big Brother

The Amazing Race

Beauty and the Geek

Fear Factor (What this has to do with eating gross stuff, I don’t know.)

Kid Nation

Pirate Master

The Real Gilligan’s Island

Talent.  And I use the word loosely.

American Idol

Dancing With the Stars

So You Think You Can Dance

America’s Got Talent

America’s Next Top Model

America’s Most Smartest Model

Make Me a Supermodel

American Band

Sunday Best

Bands on the Run

Celebrity Duets

Making the Band

Last Comic Standing

The Starlet

Pussycat Dolls: The Search for the Next Doll

Business-ish

The Apprentice

Design Star

Hell’s Kitchen

American Inventor

Project Greenlight

Project Runway

Top Design

On the Lot

MuchMusic VJ Search

It’ll Never Last - Romance in Front of a Camera Crew

Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?

The Bachelor/ette

Rock of Love (Bimbos compete for a bloated, aging, balding rock star.  Most of them had sex with him.  And bragged about it. Almost had to put this one into the train wreck category)

For Love or Money

Average Joe

Flavor of Love

I Love New York

A Shot at Love  (This one’s a bisexual love contest.  Lots of chicks making out in the hot tub.  Can you spell “gratuitous?”)

Joe Millionaire

Age of Love

Scott Baio is 45 and Single (Who cares?)

Who Wants to Marry My Dad?

Fixer-Uppers

Extreme Makeover

Extreme Home Makeover

The Biggest Loser

Celebrity Fit Club

Queer Eye For the Straight Guy (I’ve got a soft spot for this one)

Supernanny

What Not to Wear (Which my ex calls “What Not to Watch”)

Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School

Trading Spaces

Pimp my Ride

Restaurant Makeover

Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmare

Fat March

The Swan

Train Wrecks -- because you just can’t look away

The Anna Nicole Show

The Osbournes

Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica

Hogan Knows Best

The Simple Life

Tommy Lee Goes to College

The Surreal Life

Gene Simmons Family Jewels

Growing up Gotti

I’m A Celebrity -- Get Me Out of Here!

I Want to be a Hilton

The Two Coreys (I watched half an episode for old time's sake.  Is it just me, or is Haim brain-damaged?)

Masquerading as Documentaries

The Real World

Road Rules

The Real Orange County

Meerkat Manor (Yup, meerkats.)

COPS

Miami Ink

American Chopper

Dog the Bounty Hunter

The Girls Next Door

Un-categorizable

Temptation Island

The Pick-Up Artist (Okay, I actually liked this one - this bizarre looking dude who calls himself “Mystery” teaches a bunch of geeks to pick up women.  Hysterical.)

Celebrity Paranormal Project

Wife Swap (I was channel surfing and saw a man I’d been dating on this show.  No joke.  He told me he was divorced.  After watching the show, I decided I liked his wife better than him.)